HI!

Picture the inside of a giant linoleum cube. There is a woman on a giant pepperoni pizza with two leaking faucets for nipples. Various bio-chemical weapons and long forgotten confectionery exist together in peace.

That is my mind, welcome!

A forked tongue of lightning split an otherwise pristine sky. A Hammer cast of the sturdiest Uru descended from the heavens creating a brief, tenuous link between Asgard and Midgard. Mjolnir was the hammer's name, it spoke fourteen alien languages and doubled as a universal remote, encompassing enough to stop locomotives or slow down fat, jogging pedestrians.

One day after too much dog food Mjolnir decided that it needed to fill the void of its bleak existence so it composed a few symphonies which it later palmed off to Stravinsky. After solidifying its place in the upper echelons of musicdom Mjolnir decided to wrest itself into mortal affairs, taking shape as the inimitable Jake Hectic Gillies and lo a socio-economic mediocrity was b