somtimes i am perplexed by peoples behavior. perhaps it is my own actions which bother me, like why did i do this why did i ask a certain thing , because i was curious, or needed to prove to myself that i am not in love with what i thought i was. by love of course i do not mean lust, it does not really mater what a person looks like , i am basicly ugly so i see myself as not needing that reassurance.