"Nyep, well, you know, some things happen, and some things don't."

In my mind, I'm a film critic, scriptwriter and aspiring director. In reality I book and promote gigs for an arts centre in High Wycombe, review other people's gigs for a mag and a website nobody in the UK reads except the people who write it, and write horror fiction about once a month on the side.

Between 2007 and 2010 I was living just outside Glasgow, then I headed back to Sarf Lahndahn for a bit, before once more relocating to the Antiente Kingdomme of Buckinghamshire. After two years spent in the shite end (it was all I could afford) of the good old capital, it was time to leave again sooner than I expected- I didn't want to, but once the Olympics were announced, I couldn't even afford THAT aforementioned craphole area anymore (Downham, near Grove Park) and, if that weren't bad enough, my arse of a landlord 'forgot' to pay the mortgage. Like you do. If you're a retarded cunt.

There've been a few upheavals thi