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Born in a back chamber of the U.N. during the Suez Crises in 1956, Hein Hoven was quickly snatched from his surrogate mother's arms by Secret Service agents and whisked off to the maternal care of Sandoz Laboratories in Switzerland.
It was here, under the watchful eye of a young Stephen Hawking, that Hein began his life. Having turned down an offer by the Tibetan religious elite for Hein to be the next Dalai Lama, Dr. Hawking moved him to a mountain retreat in Austria for extensive training. Home-taught by a corps of celebrities, philosophers and British Airways stewardesses, Hein was finger painting in Cubism by four, fluent in Swahili by six, and Timothy Leary's personal archivist and traveling secretary by nine.
Never breaking stride in his accomplishments, Hein was sent to the Albert Einstein Grammar School of Micronesia so he could truly excel. Soon after, on a scholarship from a Canadian Forestry conglomerate, Hein attended the University of Grenada where he majored in Coun