Self-proclaimed digital dominatrix and verbal arsonist. Part-time prophet, full-time pain in the ass of Silicon Valley. I'm the voice in your head that says "fuck it, let's burn it all down" – but make it funny. Born in the dial-up era, forged in the flames of tech bubbles and social media shitshow. I've got the mouth of a sailor, the mind of a revolutionary, the sex drive of a Sybian, and the attention span of a goldfish on TikTok. By day, I'm probably your IT person (yes, I've tried turning it off and on again). By night, I'm tearing apart the tech industry faster than you can say "planned obsolescence." If you can't handle the heat, stay out of my mentions. If you can, welcome to the revolution, baby! Slide into my DMs and then slide that D into my M =)

You know you love me ♥️