People like me make this country great. Unfortunately, there aren't very many people like me. We are running low on good looking, educated and hardworking Americans. I know this because they're all on my fb friends list, and there are less than 1000 of us.

We both love breasts. I love half naked Asian chicks, SPAM, chocolate, sex and Portabello Mushrooms - not in any particular order.

She likes movies with black people in them. I like racist movies - but we get along great until she watched Tyler Perry movies.

I'm willing to try anything once, except eating poop from a grown man who's been drinking milk and beer for an entire week to wash down his broccoli and cheese diet.