I'm a love child of an Alien abductee and Japanese sumo's jock strap. i once tied my one laces but now use velcro on my spaba shoes. I was lost for 100 years in a maze and was only saves by a packet of digestives which fell out an elephants ear while it was farting oasis's live for ever on a large tub of peanut butter (sunpat). i spent my previous life as a pencil locked in a cupboard of a school teacher who's name was john.
For the last ten years i l slept on a bed of mash potatoes with 3 sausages and 4 peas with a gravy duvet and a spoon for a pillow. This was in glass bottle flouting in a sea just off bridge end.