Spacemonkey

Christopher Jonathan Rowe, or "French Chris", was "born" in 1982 in a secret research lab in Paris, the product of an experiment gone horribly wrong.

Originally conceived as a Franco-English genetic hybrid of two unwitting guinea pigs, Brigitte Vaulogé and Alan Rowe, the nefarious result was an infernal "Franglish" mutant child, who's first word uttered was, according to conflicting reports either "Daaaamien!" or "book!". A troubled childhood saw him move from one high security mental institution to another, between England and France, including "L'Ecole des Fleurs" in Villecraisnes from 1986 to 88; "Turnfurlong First School" in Aylesbury from 1988 to 1990; the dreaded "Ecole Jules Ferry" of Ormesson, known as the "French Alcatraz" from 1990 to 1993; "College Saint Exupery" and "College Bergson", in Ormesson and Montigny respectively, from 1993 to 1997; The "Lycée Pascal" in Montigny in 1997, and finally the boys correction facility, "Aylesbury Grammar School" from