Welcome to the Rat Cult, faithful one! I am the Black Metal Rat, and my followers have but one commandment: rock until it hurts.

Yeah, I'm going to level with you: I'm not a DJ. Well, not really. The furry conventions of the Pacific Northwest have been lacking someone to play heavy metal at their evening jump-around sessions, so I'm stepping up. Hopefully I can convince the local organisers that the audience is out there.